Transistion is easier for other people…wait, no… it’s just plain hard.

As a person in transition I feel it on two levels…. One as the messy person who is regrouping after a contract went away.  The other is as a researcher in the theory of behavioral change.  Unfortunately, and not surprising to anyone but me, the messy part often overshadows the researcher in me.  I am a process girl.  I found that out in grad school when there was a question on group function that we were supposed to describe.  The others in my class talked about the situation and stuff going on and I could not relate and I only see it as step by step.  It’s all I see when I see a situation.  Anyway I digress since this is a messy topic and it includes the issue of personal, reflective change.  Yeah, you know the kind you avoid like the plague if you even recognize the severity.  If you watch Downton Abbey you avoid it like Cholera.

Good god this is squashy…   so William Bridges (no coincidence I am sure) describes his own journey through transition of moving from the city to the county, and I think there was a divorce in there somewhere.  He found himself lost in the extra time he had and didn’t enjoy the awkward feelings he had as well.  So, he created a transitions group.   As you see it’s a lot easier to talk about other people’s journey than my own.  But by writing this I find solace in the fact the power lays in the center of the transition.

William Bridges’ process is simple:

1. An ending.   Something ends, dies, or changes and the structure of part of your world has changed.
2. The neutral zone:  this is what I call the “icky, awkward, in-between time.  This is where the transition formulates.  This is THE most creative time.  If you rush this, oh so awkward, phase you’ll miss formulating or waiting for the next best plan.
3. The new beginning:  this is where you find new love, you figure out where you’re going in a new town and have replaced all the old service providers, or found a new job.  Right… by then you’re over it.

So in my case I have been diligently traveling 76 miles each way to work on site as a coach for Northrop Grumman.  At the end of last year with all the talk of budget cuts to government work and other prevailing cost savings the program that funded a coach at every location was cut.   Of course there is a myriad of pluses and minuses.  The obvious one is funding cutting the program cut the funding in my household.  The upside is wide open space for creativity and finding the right niche to develop more consulting or coaching business or find the right position that might be satisfying.  What I didn’t really anticipate is the quiet.  Now I work from my home in downtown Los Angeles.  The outside is noisy but here in my office it’s pretty quiet.  I realized that I have to intentionally make social plans and form my own version of a transition group.  That will help with the urge to solve it now.

So think back to changes in your life… when things really got turned upside down.  What do you notice now?  Can you see this process in that period of time?  Was it awkward?  Did you rush through it to solve it?  Did you give it the time needed to really get a solution that was sustainable?  Can you see the possibility of creativity in that time period?  What would you tell someone during this time period?

Tell me your experience!

Success is a group effort

You can’t do any behavioral change in a vacuum.  Okay maybe this is a little too global and not really on point.  However I am reading about the sales process and how to create a system of sales activities to grow my business.  Now that I have capacity I need to generate activity or some would call it income or business.  That includes blogging and it includes making outbound calls to people who might bring me business or hire me directly.  So having years of sales experience in what I call “digger” sales I should be really good at this, right?

Well, it appears that I am both the client and the coach here because I can see clearly that my problem starts with time management.  Actually it might be my focus during what looks like workflow.  That means when I should be writing or generating a new email blast, I am chatting with colleagues about work.  Not really doing the work but talking about doing the work.  It feels like work.  Does it get me closer to bringing in new business?  So… uh, no and well, hmmm.  Tough reality when I know I’ve heard it come out of my mouth as a coach.  The book says the difference between success and failure, not sure it was that dichotomous, is pig-headed discipline.  Pig-headed discipline requires absolute diligence on creating the system and working the system.  He says it takes six months to really make it the fabric of the company.  I believe that it helps to have others check your work to see that it’s done.  I remember when I used to be so focused and disciplined in the sales process.  I was really successful and made a lot of money.  So I know I have it in me.  But that was a long time ago.

How can I make this fun?  Fun?  Really, it seemed like a great question when I asked my client.  But now looking down my nose at it sure feels different.

How can I make the sales process fun?  I know from the past it’s a numbers game.  Talk to so many people and set so many appointments and teach people how to use my product and the rest just follows.   Okay back to the fun part, how do I make this fun?   Rewards?  Yes, maybe.  What about finding interesting people work with?  I have worked with really fun clients whom I haven’t talked to in while.  I’ll start there and see how they are progressing.   That is fun for me

Here is what I’ve read and committed to do each day:

• At the end of each select the six most important things that need to be done tomorrow.
• Schedule email time and stick to that time.
• Spend 2.5 hours on building business.
• Pig-headed discipline to the process.
• Do the harder / more emotional / detailed work earlier in the morning when I am fresh.

All right this has already changed my attitude.   The part about the vacuum is where friends and colleagues who are also avoiding doing things they don’t want to do will find me less available if I have that pig-headed discipline.  But that’s for me to manage. Right?  Since I’ve told you I’ve already started to manage it.  You’ll keep me on task, right?

What did I do all day?

What can we learn from robotics in packaging?   I was boasting to a colleague who retired from the same company that cut the program I was on that I could write on any topic.  The truth is that I am not really able to write on any topic.  Or am I?  Just kidding – I am not writing on the topic above.

The topic we talked about and I find myself inclined to write about is massive structural change in our day.  This is the first day that I would have been back to work. This is the first day of the business year.  This is her first day of not going into the office and she feels the impact of retiring.  That really is weird. She retired and I my contract was cut which is different and yet weirdly similar.  In fact I couldn’t believe how, in the conversation with her, I was missing thoughts and words.  I remembered it’s been happening the last couple weeks.  I thought I had early onset of Alzheimers but it could really be just stress.  Stress does amazing things to your mind.  And you can’t feel the damage.  But you can see (feel or hear) the damage in loss of words and loss of finishing sentences or loss of focus or motivation.  Remarkable.  I am supposed to be so tough and bold.  But when it comes down to it …I am just as weak and fallible as every other human being.  While my intention is to create or find new sources of revenue I am going through some of the same reaction to the massive change. Really?  Me, I am supposed to help other people through these times.  Right….except that in order to help them I have to be available to help myself through the same awkward steps.  Oh, and I have to be real about the process they are experiencing with me and them.

The toughest part of the change is losing the social aspect of work.   I realized this several times when in the past six years in and out of corporate contracts.  The people you miss are the ones you wouldn’t see if they didn’t walk past your office and drop in or you run into them at the cafeteria getting a cup of coffee.  You also miss the ones you’ll pick up the phone to call or set a meetup with them.  But now they’re busy and you’re, well, not.  There is no explaining how the emotions flow:

• Fear – lack of clear vision of how this will turn out okay…
• Elation – waking up in the morning realizing that you don’t have to be anywhere in particular.
• Terror – waking up in the morning realizing that you don’t have to be anywhere in particular.
• Curiosity – I see other people appear to enjoy the freedom of retirement or working from home, how do they do it?
• Anger – I wasn’t ready, I was talked into it, I should have thought this through, they shouldn’t have let me go, what was I thinking?
• Relief – the process of leaving is over and I don’t have to hold my blackberry 24/7.
• Confusion – really I looked at my blackberry that many times a day? What am I going to do instead?
• Shame – I wish I had a blackberry to look at now, what was I thinking, I am nothing without the brand of a large corporation, what value does someone who isn’t productive or contributing to the larger world, what’s wrong with me if I just want to garden or don’t want to garden?
• Inadequacy – the preparation to retire doesn’t really prepare you for the emotions of retirement or layoff and the awkward feeling of retooling a lifestyle.
• Greif – remember the stages from Kubler-ross?  Yes, they apply; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance with no chronological order or consistency.
• Memory loss – emotional stress causes the loss of words, or thoughts
• Isolation – in your bathrobe until noon … or later?

Seriously now what on earth do you do with all that?  The truth is that with massive change it takes longer than you want.  Jumping from corporate to “freedom from corporate” isn’t for the faint of heart.  You are probably getting so much “great” advice in the unsolicited category.  But what advice would you give someone whose entire lifestyle is suddenly different?  Would you bring down the hammer and say, get productive!  I certainly hope not.  I hope there is a bit about being gentle.  You may even want to allow yourself a certain amount of days where you “ease” into a new lifestyle.  Creative space isn’t forged but it does flow to fill a vacuum.  So be very gentle and what the heck, maybe your first outing is to buy a better bathrobe and new coffee pot.   Peace out, be gentle and enjoy!

What you don’t know could hurt your career.

In coaching we concentrate on three areas; changing you, changing your job or changing your career.  Now I realize those are broad strokes on change and in consulting the areas are different but concentrate on changing individuals in group forums.  So back to you… the one thing you can do, while better understanding your career and job options, is to get to know yourself better.  In the 50’s Joe and Harry created a four square matrix on the sides of your motivation and behaviors.  They are categorized by, what else, four areas.  The behaviors that you know you do, and others know you do.  The behaviors that you know you do and others don’t know or see you do.  The behaviors that  you don’t see and others see.  And lastly the behaviors or motivation that’s  not conscious to you or to others.

The only area that has magical growth potential is the area that you’re not conscious of but others clearly see you do.  In coaching we work to make that quadrant smaller.    It takes courage to actually ask people what they see you do that might prevent you from moving forward in your professional path.  It takes a real desire to change things holding you back to ask the questions and stay open to the answers.  It also is the sign of great leadership.  You remember the story of the emperor with the tailor?  There is another post on that.   But great leaders are ones who aren’t afraid of the truth or new ideas or real dialogue on their behavior that might be mitigate success.

There are many ways to discover in this process:

• formal coaching to better understand through reflection feedback
• 360 or multi-rater feedback tool
• ask people within a circle of trust then move to open up that circle
• behavioral assessments that show preferences or unconscious actions
• read about different situations
• journal with an eye of a third party investigative pen

The point is to do something to better understand yourself.  That awareness will be a cause set in motion.  Don’t shoot the messenger.  Don’t assume that all behaviors need to be changed.  Just stay open and interested like a friend was telling you a story they really wanted to share.

The ROI on this isn’t quantifiable but coaching has 500 to 700% return.  If you take that over your career lifespan the numbers are ridiculous.

Let me know how I can help….

Time for a business review of the brand called you!

Successful companies pay thousands of dollars to ensure they have the right brand strategy.  They go through a branding exercise which can look like many different processes.  But all of those procedures outline and define the essence of the product or service.  With words and pictures and a room full of “key stakeholders” will contribute thoughts about their connection to the emotion of the brand or service.  This is closely aligned with the process creating the “mission vision and values” statements that precede the strategic planning process.  Branding is much like strategic planning when the brand exists.  Oh wait – it is a process of shining light on the current brand and really looking at whether it’s the brand we want to be then getting buy-in (agreement) at all levels to create change which could also look like achieving goals.

Successful business people also need to fully understand their brand and assess the similarity or disparity to our assumptions.  By that I mean your brand is in your control and you have to look at it from time to time to see if you are on track?  Does your behavior and contribution line up with the direction you want you career to take?  If you own the business, does you behavior match your business goals?  How do you know?  Just like you do business reviews for your clients, you must do a business review for your own brand, contribution and goals.

Here are three questions you can ask yourself or your team to clearly identify your brand, your contribution and outline goals for your career or product for 2011.

•What is the essence of the product or you?  What words describe you?  What does it look like?  What color is it?  What emotion does it evoke?
•What’s the burning question your business or product answers?  In the case of you what problem do you solve?  What happens when the client interacts with your product or service? Whose problems am I solving?
•At the end of 2011 what do we want to have changed, grown, learned or fixed?

This is as simple as a pad of paper.  There are many more questions you can ask to start the thought process.  It may be helpful to get a roomful room full of people to help you brainstorm with you.  If you would like more questions to ask in this group form please send me an email.

Whether you sell a product or your service is the product or you work inside an organization your contribution to the brand is ongoing.  Treat this as a living document to be revisited quarterly or at least annually.

Don’t forget to have fun with this process.  The closer you are to your true brand your contribution is lighter and brighter and so not like work!

Layoffs, Leadership and Emotions: The Trifecta of Discomfort

Being the social scientist that I am, I was drawn to do some research on the human side of layoffs. I found a statement which said, “…dismissing 1% of your work force evokes a 31% increase in turnover.” I just threw that out on social media. It was from a credible source, so I just threw it out there. Several people asked questions (Ellen and Kelly), prompting me to dig further. Here is some context from the article and some additional change management thought process.

The article, by Wendy Mack and Deanna Banks, spoke to leaders about managing the process of ensuring that the work force is appropriated properly on their bottom line. These leaders must make very unpopular decisions. They most likely don’t feel good about the selection process, or about facing those people, in the process of turning them out onto the streets. But nobody thinks about them, do they? Well, not managing the human side of being a leader carries a hidden cost. As the process of laying off employees starts, discussions held behind closed doors become secretive. That is where the article says things go terribly wrong. The secretive nature of the meetings may or may not be public knowledge, but it can cause the energy or vibe in the office to change, and people react to that inherently. Leaders don’t want to alarm people so they say nothing – or worse, they may not be truthful. Employees find this unsettling. They feel unappreciated and certainly not part of the team. Unfortunately when the truth come s forward the trust is broken.  This is a lot of energy directed in places other than work.

Layoffs are often executed with very little processing time. One minute, someone is called into an office and the next minute, they’re escorted out of the building. The co-workers with whom they have relationships they’ve cultivated daily, possibly for years and sometimes for longer than their marriages, are left standing, wondering what happened. They are also wondering what’s next for them. This is not an environment of safety. It’s one that evokes the basic reaction of fight or flight, which Walter Canon described as a very human response to fear.

Now in the work place, it’s not politically appropriate to fight. Nor is the timing any better when you’re in danger of losing your job. ‘Just deal with it quietly,’ that’s the implicit message when a leader swoops in, fires someone, then goes back into their own office and closes the door. The remaining employees are left grieving the loss on many levels; for those relationships, the illusion of security, the understanding of their job duties, the environment of safety, and their value to the organization and team. They are asked to manage their emotions without showing them, plus get additional work done. Naturally, internal productivity goes down and so does customer service.

In addition to worrying about those who’ve been discarded, remaining employees may also believe they are next. The only sure way to check their value is by leaving.  People react with fear. Leaders who are especially adept at human interaction will save many of those relationships and, just as importantly, all the tacit knowledge and skills that are in those employees. These are leaders who minimize the “survivor’s sickness” of which Wendy and Deanna speak in their article. They also minimize turnover.

The quick version of their recommendations for how to ease the people side of layoffs all stems around grieving and continuing to communicate through the process. The hot new idea (it’s about time!) is ‘transparency’. That’s just clear communication and allowing people to know what’s going on so they can contribute.

• Senior leaders must be more available and visible.
• Communicate openly internally, as if the employees are part of the team. Don’t just parrot the crafted verbiage which investors want to hear.
• Allow time to process: both the trusted employee being laid off and the remaining employees are left to pick up the pieces of their loss.
• Know that your employees are watching how you treat those who are leaving.
• Appreciate the additional workload for those employees remaining.
• Again, realize that your employees have relationships with those who’ve been impacted.

Now what? As a leader you’re wondering, what should you do? Build in support for those in the positions to execute the layoffs. Expect a period of time that will really show the impact of the changes that have been made. As a leader, you have the same emotions, but you have additional responsibilities to the company and to the employees. Open your door and listen. You will hear the ‘state of the state’ and be able to minimize negative impacts. People need to be heard. The article describes emotions that are likely to appear: Shock, anger, fear, anxiety, hopelessness and sadness. These aren’t stages that all people go through, but some will feel them. Listen for signs that people are getting stuck in these emotions.

Sheila Simon, a Minneapolis Spiritual Grief and Business Consultant, suggests a simple set of questions from Dr. John Schneider to help people move through their grief. This is not easy, but it is simple. Ask, “What is lost?” Then ask, “What is left?” And when you’ve moved through those questions and the group is ready, ask, “What is possible?” When you get to what is possible, the sparks will really fly, bringing in new life and new ideas. If you’re uncomfortable holding those conversations, hire a trained facilitator or coach to hold conversations and get the emotion out of the corners and into the room, where you can honor and face it.

Communication through change is essential for smooth transitions. Managing people can be messy, and so is change. But ‘business as usual’ isn’t going to work anymore.

Resources:
Mack, W. & Banks, Ph.D., D (2009) Leading after Layoffs: Best Practices for Re-Energizing Your Workforce, wendymack.com , retrieved 10/21/09 from http://wendymack.com/resource-center/layoffs-anxiety-energy-ebooks-wendy-mack.html.
Bridges, W. (1988). Transitions: Making sense of life’s changes. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley Publishing Company.
Bridges, W. (1991). Managing Transitions: Making the most of change.  Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley Publishing Company.
Schneider, Ph.D., J. (1989, 11/03/09). The Transformative Power of Grief. Noetic.org Retieved 11/03/09, from .http://www.noetic.org/publications/review/issue12/r12_Schneider.html.

Motivational Idea for Week 35

Motivation is even more important today than a week ago.  Actually, not really more important, but just as important as it was a week ago.  It’s Sunday night, the Packer’s are beating the Bears  so all is right with the world.  Now I am starting to think about my week ahead.  I promised that I would put new motivational ideas here weekly.  Since I couldn’t get it posted on Friday I thought I would add this before the next week started.

Week 35
Start a book club – a business book club.  Put it on the calendar and put it into the work day.  They may (like there’s even a chance) not get time to read during the day.  But talking about the content of the book during the day makes sense as it’s a strong component of leadership development.  The employees build their library, you build your people, you gain a cohesively formed team, and they build internal relationships and grow their resources especially if the club is cross departmental.   Select the list of top business books including a selection of team building, communication skills, presentation skills, change management, innovation or biographies.  When they come to consensus on the books they are using team skills and self forming groups with emergent leadership.  It’ll bring out useful skills in other situations.

Start with one of my great take-aways from grad school which is a book on how to read a book in 30 minutes.   I thought this was an optional book.  But it was THE single best book I bought, EVER!   The book is by Mortimer Adler and it’s called How to Read a Book: The Classic Guide to Intelligent Reading. This book will save you and your people hours of time wading through the pulp of a great book.  They will read more if they can get through the books faster.  So will you.

If your team is dispersed bring them in via teleconference.   The program would be especially effective with a sales team who is separated by distance around the country.

Establish some ground rules or let them form their own group and rules.  Here are sample ground rules:
1.    Get a core group of people to start it.
2.    Establish a regular schedule.
3.    Advertise the program.
4.    Create a simple list of questions to create a dialogue on the book; over all reaction, biggest take away, any surprises, any inconsistencies, anything we can implement, how?
5.    Ask for stand in facilitators to each volunteer to manage a meeting.
6.    Start with a list of books to schedule.
7.    Give it twelve months with a few months off during vacation season or the tough season for your business.

Trust that you employees will be responsible and fulfill their commitment to the group.  They will have to contribute or be noticeably a slacker.  Regardless of how much they read they will get the gist of the book and the benefits of reading the book by attending the meeting or reading part of the book.

I would love to hear how this idea works in your office.

Motivation When the Job Search Dries Up

The Pipeline Dry…Now What?

You’re out!  You’ve told everyone you can bear to tell you’re on the market and what you would like to find.  You’re networking like the books say.  You’re doing everything right.  It’s just not falling into place as fast as you would like.   Now what?  Just like you wouldn’t allow your staff or the sales team or your kids to quit until they’ve finished the job, you can’t quit going after the right job until you’re placed in the position which satisfies your career goals.  You have consulted your financial advisor and you know your situation with the impact of losing income.
How do you stay motivated?   You were are so driven in your career that you don’t get why you might be slipping here.

Motivation is intrinsic.   What does that mean?  Yeah, I need a job…so this is brilliant?  Actually “they” have been studying motivating employees since the industrial revolution (20’s and 30’s) where changing the lighting, either making it brighter or darker increased productivity.  One study in the Harvard Business Review from the 70’s from Harry Levinson called the “Great Jackass Fallacy” where the leaders are genuinely stunned the employees don’t actually have the same motivation as they do.  They had no idea that employees should be involved in decision making.  But of course you’re well aware of all that.

McClelland, who widely speaks to the motivation need theory and groups managers three ways – whether they need to be likes (affiliative), ones who need to achieve (achievement) and get things done, and then there are the ones who are driven by power.  I am sure each one of these descriptors has a face when you read through these.
Frederick Herzberg makes more sense to me.  His study from the sixties Motivation-Hygiene Theory proposes that employees are motivated more by the job than the pay or benefits.  The environment, the pay, benefits, social aspects or how you get along with your co-workers won’t actually de-motivate you.  They won’t motivate you beyond a certain point either.  But he contends that the level of challenge in the job, how autonomous you are in your job, your intrinsic interest and how much opportunity for creativity you bring to your job.

Yeah, yeah, get to the part where I can be more motivated in my job search.  Well, glad you’re still reading.  I believe that once your job search is up and running the challenge diminishes. Really your resume looks good and even you’re comfortable with it.  Your contacts all (first tier and part of the second tier) know that you’re looking.  And quite frankly it doesn’t take you all day to do the search.  It’s quiet.  Going from being attached to a bberry 24/7 to managing the search details in a few hours a day is a cultural shift that’s odd.  New behavior is odd.  Silence is de-motivating.  Or is it?

Tactical tips on how to stay motivated using evidence based motivational theory:

• Challenge yourself to sit in the silence – great ideas fill a vacuum.
• Know that doing the same hours from the corporate drive is going to burn you out fast. Put in the effort in 3 to 8 hours a day and then do something replenishing.
• Find a job that you think would be fun but not directly related to your past – challenge yourself to find experience and transferable skills you would bring to the job.
• Go to the library – librarians are the least used resource as a brainstorming partner.
• Go hit balls at the driving range – not as expensive as a round and you never know who will be next to you or in line to get a beverage.  (do something of interest while networking)
• Paint your house.  By doing something outside your norm you are challenged and the head space leaves room for creativity.
• The job search is entirely autonomous as it is up to you to create the pathway to new employment.
• Ensure that your target job search is true to your intrinsic interests and values.
• If there is a to-do item that goes from day to day without?  Take a strong look at it.  Is it important?  What will it feel like to finish?  Either take one step towards it or take it off.
• Work doing something for a non-profit or someone in need, volunteering will at least help you know that you have something to contribute.

Your challenge when the immediate energy dwindles is to pull out the motivation to create a list that might be what you thought of second tier.  Maybe you’re on the third tier.  It’s still up to you to come up with new ideas and stay positive and more importantly stay engaged in the search. If you need help find a job search group of like-minded colleagues.  If you can’t find one – start one.   If you want help with ideas, motivation or support — call a coach.

10 Ways to Energize Your Job Search!

What to do if you don’t know what to do.

So I have spent more time procrastinating on this blog than ever before. Oh…I guess I am not counting the time before I even started the blog and posted my first one. It’s amazing what a person can do to distract oneself from the task at hand. Is distract the right word? Or would protect be a better word? I don’t know since blogging is the way I will connect with people who need to change their organization or want to change their career. If I don’t blog my business won’t grow. That seems like that should be incentive enough to move the hands to keyboard right? Well eventually it was or you wouldn’t be reading anything new on my blog. But what was the problem? In looking back I don’t know the exact spot where the problem rises and thwarts my efforts to succeed. What I do know is that procrastination is insidious and comes in many logical rational forms which give appearance to working. It looks like I am actually doing my job but am I doing the most important thing I need to do at the time.

Part of my problem was that I wasn’t really clear on what to write about. I coach on conflict but I see so many people stuck in the hard part of change. What’s more important? Either way it’s a conflict either with yourself, someone in your organization or the change itself. So I sit at a blank page and what? I don’t usually work that way. I do nothing (or so it appears to those watching) and then when I write it takes no time at all. But until I get the idea I am flustered and actually quite hard on myself. So instead of giving you ideas of growing your emotional behavioral self I am going to give you ideas of what to do when you need to germinate an idea, or motivate yourself to write that cover letter or pick up the phone to call someone new in your network.

Ten ways to bring new life into your change process:

1. Take a break from your electronic screen(s). A full cup cannot accept more. With additional room (quiet) you’ll find new ideas. Look away from the screen. Besides you don’t let your kids watch as much TV or play as many video games as they want to and you know why, because it doesn’t evoke creativity.
2. Coach someone on the same topic. Doing something nice for someone else feels good but it makes you aware of what you can do. It’s actually third order of learning which solidifies new information in your own brain and behavioral pattern.
3. Finish something that’s hanging out there. It’s started. It was a great idea when you started it. It’s just hanging out there calling to you. FINISH IT! You get the reward of it being done but positive psychologists connect accomplishment to happiness which I equate to creativity.
4. Give back to the community. Volunteering, positive psychologists show incremental sustainable happiness through helping others. Get involved with an organization that brings out your passion; you’re productive, it feels good and who knows who you might meet.
5. Bring a plant home. Digging your hands in the dirt has great rewards. First it’s good for the planet, second the feeling of your hands in the dirt brings you back to solid ground (no pun intended) and third the physicality of moving dirt around for live entity is empowering. Better yet start a kitchen garden and grow some delicious food that nourishes you body and mind which would be the fourth benefit.
6. Find something, anything to be grateful about. It might even be that your cup of coffee is the exact right temperature. People who are mindful of all the good in their lives are shown to have more genuine happiness.
7. Take a walk even if the weather isn’t optimal. Put your sneakers on and go outside. Say hello to everyone you see. I live in LA and it’s fun to get the surprised response from people. Connecting with people even at that level brings humanity back to your day.
8. Call someone who’s always delighted to hear from you. They may be an Aunt or an old friend whom you know would LOVE to hear from you. Those ten minutes can make their day and yours. If you can ask for their help on your stuck situation you might get a great idea. Who knows? They might have a lead or an idea for you. They have friends who have friends or kids in high places you’d like to be.
9. Plan a future date for something fun. How will you celebrate your new job when you get it? Is it a ski trip next season? A trip to botanical garden? Long lingering lunch with a dear friend before you go back to work?
10. Prepare to be busy. You know this time when you aren’t crazy busy will be gone before you know it and those projects that take time could be moved along now. Get new systems in place so when your time is much more structured things will go more smoothly.

In other words when you’re stuck or at a standstill with the job search or the project at hand do something counter intuitive. It’s amazing what happens when you take a break and replenish the juices. Stephen Covey in his book Seven Habits of Highly Successful People, talks about sharpening the saw using the analogy of cutting lumber (task) with a dull saw takes more time to cut the same amount of wood, than taking the time to sharpen the saw and then proceed with the same task. In that respect you could coach someone else on how to do the same thing you’re trying to do and see how productive you become. Now go play and find some new ideas!

10 signs you are in the way of getting a job

10 signs your emotions are getting in the way of getting a job

1. You didn’t go outside today (or yesterday.)
2. You stop taking calls from friends.
3. You wonder when telling people what’s going on if you’ve done enough or worse.
4. Your favorite thing to do is sleep. Or you wake up in a dark place you don’t like.
5. Late night television is better than going to bed.
6. Alcohol consumption increases to point of distraction. Whatever your drug of choice is that physically changes you or distracts you from getting a job.
7. You don’t go to networking meetings because “they don’t work.”
8. You talk to potential employers and network connections about how wronged you’ve been.
9. Even you wouldn’t hire the person on your resume.
10. You resent your coworkers who didn’t get laid off.

If you identify yourself in one of these issues, you’re reeling from the impact of layoffs. Yes, there is the financial part which is hard and fast. There is the tactical, technical part which again is logical and tangible. These are completely understood by you and your family.

But what are you doing with the actual process of grieving the loss of who you are without the J.O.B.? Many large brands laid off hundreds of thousands of people this past year or two. In our culture branding is synonymous with decision making. You decide quality and purchase value before you even enter the buying market. When employed by that brand your job is to build that business. That means you compare and contrast to the businesses you compete with in the line of business you sell. Number one in your industry or was your team number one in your class? Without the giant brand behind you what are you? Are you the candidate of choice? How does that translate to home? It’s worse when you are subconsciously asking if you are the spouse, friend, son, daughter of choice. Branding is innocuous so we don’t think about it. It’s always there. It’s just understood. Walk (or be pushed) away from personal alignment with that brand and you are, um, what? That void is real.

The second issue is time. Time for a job search is non-comparative to the “normal world. If you held any success in your previous position you could be on your blackberry 24/7 and it was active with lots of other people just like you. You called it keeping pace. In fact it was how you stayed relevant. Now how is the pace? Quiet? Can make your follow up calls in twenty minutes? Can you peruse the usual job sites in another hour? Thankfully it takes a couple of hours to truly commit to sending a well written cover letter to the right person by doing a little research into your extended network. Or then what do you do? Do you watch daytime television? How do you fill your day, days, weeks…and now is it months?

Third, how do you explain to those around you how productive you are when you don’t feel like that’s enough? Do you tell your spouse, yes, I only applied to one job? Has your enthusiasm faded in your search? You feel it, your family feels it. How do you reassure them when you need reassurance? They have the same fears as you. When they ask you about the path you’re on they want you to be strong and they may not be able to mask their fears after time either. When you both need reassurance what happens? You still need to have a brave front face that empty page every day.

There are people who can help. Get individual or group support with people who aren’t directly impacted by your layoff but can support you through yours. Even if you’re excited to be moving to the next step it’s okay to surround yourself with a productive group of supportive people. Who are facing the same issues as you face. It’s time to talk about what’s going on inside.  I know…I have been there.  It’s a wild, but not fun ride.

Patricia Weiland
www.sage4change.com